Girls Like Me…

“When you go to university you will find better partners. Soma upite Wale wazuri Wako university ” That is what they told you when you were in high school yeah? I don’t know why but before you join campus you just think during admission day you’re just going to meet your soul mate. Fast forward after graduating he will take you out this evening and propose to you in this posh restaurant then you will be there crying blah blah you know how that scene from that movie goes yeah? Then you live happily ever after.By the way If your love story followed this script and now you are living happily ever after please send me the exact prayer you said letter by letter. I need it.help a sister.

Because Girls like me as much as we drink water faithfully, brush before we sleep, we don’t even post “men are trash” we stay behind after service to socialise. You even lose count of the number of frogs you’re supposed to kiss to get to your Prince Charming. every day hoping the next one is the prince and boom! It’s another frog. We don’t give up. I’m not talking about girls who have it smooth. You see the blessed type that fall in love and just like that three years down the line they walk down the aisle?

I’m talking about girls like me who face it rough. The type that instead of cupid shooting you and your partner peacefully, cupid shoots you alone. Wow cupid. So you fall in love alone it’s like you are in a relationship alone. While girls my age are busy going out on dates with their loved ones girls like me nurse heart breaks from guys who are not even theirs. When you are so close to getting into a relationship cupid decides otherwise. (face palm). You get led on. Someone awakens the fire in you then decides to leave. You experience a series of unreplied texts and blueticks.

Girls like me are poets. No don’t get it twisted we are not writers but somehow these heartbreaks make us mini Shakespeares.

Girls like me cry on their wedding days. No we are not cry babies. It’s because of the number of frogs you have had to kiss because you meet this being. And you can’t believe it is actually happening.

But by the time we get there. (you see how we are positive) He! We Have to sacrifice I don’t know three black cows one with medium sized horns and one white goat with two brown spots . Unless we do that texts like “I will hurt you so I can’t date you..you deserve someone better ” will never leave our phones. (why do people say this anyway. Next article alert)

But girls like me love hard.

Cupid! Cupid! Cupid! How many times have I called you?

Next time shoot us both.

Because girls like me are here in campus waiting for “wale wazuri”

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When You Board A Matatu To Ukambani

Just like that you decide to board a Matatu tu ukambani. Not the fancy Nissans from kinatwa Sacco. I am Talking about the big bread shaped ones.

Darling you were not ready for this. When you’re travelling with ukambani Matatus you get the full pack. You get a mall because everything is happening inside the matatu: you were not ready for an animal orphanage and a market. Chances of you sitting with a goat with sugarcane tied to it are so high. Onomatopoeia all the way. (that word is just for show off btw)

Then there is that mama that boards the Matatu thirty minutes after the journey starts, preaches prays for you and there’s offering btw but unlike the normal church services where people put it out there it’s time for offering this mama will say “Kama umebarikiwa na Ungetaka hii huduma iendelee na wengine wabarikiwe Unaweza nibariki na kakitu” then she alights.

Phew! Very relieved that the next journey is going to be smooth. The Matatu slows down and It’s now time for (drum rolls) market time!!!! “hii dawa inatibu kila Aina ya ugonjwa.. Kwa Duka utapata na miA tatu Lakini Ntakuuzia Kwa mia hamsini bei ya kampuni”…..”ukinunua biskwit (intentional) mbili utapata moja bure.. ” The guy alights. And again you relax. You’re adjusting so that you rest.

No honey you didn’t buy any ticket for a concert. But now it’s time for Ken Wa Maria concert. ” these are my things…these are my fundamendooos..” you know songs from that region starts on the climax.

By the time you reach your destination you’re tired both mentally and physically , you know all the lyrics to Ken Wa Maria songs, you have bought things, bought medicine, you understand animal language like doctor Doolittle(by the way if you watched this movie you need to get married), burnt calories from being thrown up and down and you’re saved ready for heaven.

Name a travelling agency that offers a mall, an orphanage, a church service and a concert at once. I’ll wait

Girls Like Me…

“When you go to university you will find better partners. Soma upite Wale wazuri Wako university ” That is what they told you when you were in high school yeah? I don’t know why but before you join campus you just think during admission day you’re just going to meet your soul mate. Fast forward after graduating he will take you out this evening and propose to you in this posh restaurant then you will be there crying blah blah you know how that scene from that movie goes yeah? Then you live happily ever after.By the way If your love story followed this script and now you are living happily ever after please send me the exact prayer you said letter by letter. I need it.help a sister.

Because Girls like me as much as we drink water faithfully, brush before we sleep, we don’t even post “men are trash” we stay behind after service to socialise. You even lose count of the number of frogs you’re supposed to kiss to get to your Prince Charming. every day hoping the next one is the prince and boom! It’s another frog. We don’t give up. I’m not talking about girls who have it smooth. You see the blessed type that fall in love and just like that three years down the line they walk down the aisle? 

I’m talking about girls like me who face it rough. The type that instead of cupid shooting you and your partner peacefully, cupid shoots you alone. Wow cupid. So you fall in love alone it’s like you are in a relationship alone. While girls my age are busy going out on dates with their loved ones girls like me nurse heart breaks from guys who are not even theirs. When you are so close to getting into a relationship cupid decides otherwise. (face palm). You get led on. Someone awakens the fire in you then decides to leave. You experience a series of unreplied texts and blueticks. 

Girls like me are poets. No don’t get it twisted we are not writers but somehow these heartbreaks make us mini Shakespeares.

Girls like me cry on their wedding days. No we are not cry babies. It’s because of the number of frogs you have had to kiss because you meet this being. And you can’t believe it is actually happening. 

But by the time we get there. (you see how we are positive) He! We Have to sacrifice I don’t know three black cows one with medium sized horns and one white goat with two brown spots . Unless we do that texts like “I will hurt you so I can’t date you..you deserve someone better ” will never leave our phones. (why do people say this anyway. Next article alert) 

But girls like me love hard. 

Cupid! Cupid! Cupid! How many times have I called you? 

Next time shoot us both. 

Because girls like me are here in campus waiting for “wale wazuri”

BEFORE YOU SAY SHE AIN’T “wife material”…

Before you open your mouth to say she’s not wife material ask yourself if you are a husband material too. Before you even think of calling her loose or ratchet or whatever name that suits you “saint” ask yourself if you’ve participated in making her that. If you have shut up and start your journey of repentance. Or better still find yourself a spot in the market place where all day is talking about others.

Girls dream of marrying virgins too. They too want a husband material and not some guy who keeps on smoking all day and checking out every single girl at sight and sleeps around. Not guys who’s ego is higher than the cost of living in Kenya today.  Girls too want that guy who can stick to one girl for loyalty purposes and not a guy with so many girls who are fit to be an audience in a rally. We are no longer interested in guys with plans and ambitions but  guys with actions.

So you think you are just going to use a girl and then later in life get married to this good girl. jokes on you.. you attract your own kind and you are going to get your match. Be the kind of man you’d want your sister or your daughter to be with.

We too want men who our daughters and sons will look up to as role models. Not someone who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of keeping her. Someone who makes an impact and leaves a legacy.

Dear all guys who’s ego is high..we girls have a phobia for heights so you might want to starve that ego and feed your souls.

To girls before you allow someone to call you that know your worth. Don’t be someone’s sometimes. Don’t give people reasons to call you that. Stick to your principles and don’t sleep around.

Let God make a man out of him before you try to make a husband out of him.

HIGH SCHOOL TEACHERS STICK TO YOUR PROFESSION YOU CAN’T DETERMINE OUR FUTURE!!!!!

There were the good teachers of course. The rare kind who’d encourage  you and make you see there is really light at the end of the tunnel. Then there is this other type you’d think they are doing you a favor by having triple lessons in the hot afternoon. This type that felt like they’re are using a stylus to teach and not a normal chalk.

Yes this type that acted like they graduated from Harvard and are just there to give back to the society. I am talking about those “prophets” who already “knew” what grade you will get in your final year when you were only in form two. (smh). Those that already predicted your failure and made you believe you could not make it. The type that separated the chaff(students termed as failures) from the wheat(students termed as bright)

That shameless type who would sit in the staff room and discuss students all day and poison each other then expect a student to sit down in class and understand everything. Then shamelessly go to the road to protest that their salaries should be increased. For what? For the dreams you’ve killed? For the negative attitude you have impacted? For the esteem you brought down to feed your ego? For the time you wasted in the common room talking about a student? Salary increment should be for good teachers only. The rare beautiful souls.

You make it big and they’re there telling others how they “helped you”

To all this dark soul beings (i am not sure whether i am supposed to refer you as teachers) your students are out there succeeding in all the areas you didn’t believe in.

So now close your eyes..imagine your daughter is being taught by a teacher exactly like you…do you like it?? If no then change!!!!!

 

I’M AT THAT STAGE IN MY LIFE WHEREBY…

I am at that stage in my life where i am so comfortable in being single that i don’t want to leave this zone. That moment in my life where i don’t have to check up on anyone or treat people more special than others. That point where i don’t really bother about fashion anymore because i don’t need to impress anyone (haha i mean any guy). That point where i get so hurt when people are walking out of my life when i’m expecting them to actually run out of my life. (pun intended)

That point where suddenly my mum is my best friend and my dad is my super hero. That point where i have come to appreciate the value of family. And everything that my mum once told me is making sense like take time and guard your heart and that good things do take time. What my dad said about working hard and nothing comes easy is making sense too.

That point in my life where i’m getting heartbreaks from people who are not even mine. (trust me its not the best feeling) Close people betraying me and i somehow have to deal with it. Close people pushing you away when you try to care. I’m definitely at that stage where every song..every photo is just a reminder of a memory that you went through(that point where lyrics are making sense)

That point in my life where i am trying to figure out my life and who i really am. It just hit me and i don’t know why. that point where peace is my priority and i just want my space. that point that i just found out i’m not really extroverted i am somewhere in between wanting to be out there and at the same time reserved. Just somewhere in between an introvert and extrovert.

That point that i’m torn in between my passion for writing and my passion for coding. I want to be the tech girl and write thousand lines of code and maybe visit my favorite place in this world (silicon valley) and get the Zuckerberg-Bill Gates-Steve jobs type of feeling  and the same time write for New York times. My obsession for tech and books is just another feeling which is out of this world.

At that point when this guy used to give me butterflies and now its like all the butterflies have died. (story for another day)

I am at that point where i am just letting Jesus take the wheel.

“I’M FINE”

She wasn’t sad anymore. She was numb but she new somehow numb was worse. She keeps hoping that one morning she is going to wake up and this deep hurting will have disappeared but it never goes. It stays there right beside her holding tight like a fluke in the liver. “I’m happy for you “is the greatest and hardest lie she’s had to tell. He thinks she’s mad but she’s hurt and that is the whole difference.

She acted like it was no big deal but deep inside..deep inside it literally broke her. But you know the strangest thing about this pain, is if given a chance to treat him the way he does to her, she can’t. It is not the revenge type of pain it is the bittersweet type of pain. She’s hurt mentally and emotionally. But she has chosen not to GO through pain but rather GROW through pain. He’s defensive and keeps on insisting he didn’t hurt her but what he doesn’t understand is when a person tells you that you hurt them you don’t get to decide if you didn’t.

To everyone else he’s that beast and everyone says he’s not worth fighting for but she hangs on because she knows deep inside this beast there is a beauty. He just has no idea how worthless he makes her feel. Every single day she prays to God to give her the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage to accept that she has been waiting for nothing all along.

But she knows whether you loved and won or loved and lost it was always worth it. And she’s chosen to get out of this whole situation BETTER and not BITTER. She’s going to smile like nothing happened because she’s “fine”

I wish i could hurt you the way you hurt me but i know if given a chance to do the same i wouldn’t -Arthur