BEFORE YOU SAY SHE AIN’T “wife material”…

Before you open your mouth to say she’s not wife material ask yourself if you are a husband material too. Before you even think of calling her loose or ratchet or whatever name that suits you “saint” ask yourself if you’ve participated in making her that. If you have shut up and start your journey of repentance. Or better still find yourself a spot in the market place where all day is talking about others.

Girls dream of marrying virgins too. They too want a husband material and not some guy who keeps on smoking all day and checking out every single girl at sight and sleeps around. Not guys who’s ego is higher than the cost of living in Kenya today.  Girls too want that guy who can stick to one girl for loyalty purposes and not a guy with so many girls who are fit to be an audience in a rally. We are no longer interested in guys with plans and ambitions but  guys with actions.

So you think you are just going to use a girl and then later in life get married to this good girl. jokes on you.. you attract your own kind and you are going to get your match. Be the kind of man you’d want your sister or your daughter to be with.

We too want men who our daughters and sons will look up to as role models. Not someone who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of keeping her. Someone who makes an impact and leaves a legacy.

Dear all guys who’s ego is high..we girls have a phobia for heights so you might want to starve that ego and feed your souls.

To girls before you allow someone to call you that know your worth. Don’t be someone’s sometimes. Don’t give people reasons to call you that. Stick to your principles and don’t sleep around.

Let God make a man out of him before you try to make a husband out of him.

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HIGH SCHOOL TEACHERS STICK TO YOUR PROFESSION YOU CAN’T DETERMINE OUR FUTURE!!!!!

There were the good teachers of course. The rare kind who’d encourage  you and make you see there is really light at the end of the tunnel. Then there is this other type you’d think they are doing you a favor by having triple lessons in the hot afternoon. This type that felt like they’re are using a stylus to teach and not a normal chalk.

Yes this type that acted like they graduated from Harvard and are just there to give back to the society. I am talking about those “prophets” who already “knew” what grade you will get in your final year when you were only in form two. (smh). Those that already predicted your failure and made you believe you could not make it. The type that separated the chaff(students termed as failures) from the wheat(students termed as bright)

That shameless type who would sit in the staff room and discuss students all day and poison each other then expect a student to sit down in class and understand everything. Then shamelessly go to the road to protest that their salaries should be increased. For what? For the dreams you’ve killed? For the negative attitude you have impacted? For the esteem you brought down to feed your ego? For the time you wasted in the common room talking about a student? Salary increment should be for good teachers only. The rare beautiful souls.

You make it big and they’re there telling others how they “helped you”

To all this dark soul beings (i am not sure whether i am supposed to refer you as teachers) your students are out there succeeding in all the areas you didn’t believe in.

So now close your eyes..imagine your daughter is being taught by a teacher exactly like you…do you like it?? If no then change!!!!!

 

I’M AT THAT STAGE IN MY LIFE WHEREBY…

I am at that stage in my life where i am so comfortable in being single that i don’t want to leave this zone. That moment in my life where i don’t have to check up on anyone or treat people more special than others. That point where i don’t really bother about fashion anymore because i don’t need to impress anyone (haha i mean any guy). That point where i get so hurt when people are walking out of my life when i’m expecting them to actually run out of my life. (pun intended)

That point where suddenly my mum is my best friend and my dad is my super hero. That point where i have come to appreciate the value of family. And everything that my mum once told me is making sense like take time and guard your heart and that good things do take time. What my dad said about working hard and nothing comes easy is making sense too.

That point in my life where i’m getting heartbreaks from people who are not even mine. (trust me its not the best feeling) Close people betraying me and i somehow have to deal with it. Close people pushing you away when you try to care. I’m definitely at that stage where every song..every photo is just a reminder of a memory that you went through(that point where lyrics are making sense)

That point in my life where i am trying to figure out my life and who i really am. It just hit me and i don’t know why. that point where peace is my priority and i just want my space. that point that i just found out i’m not really extroverted i am somewhere in between wanting to be out there and at the same time reserved. Just somewhere in between an introvert and extrovert.

That point that i’m torn in between my passion for writing and my passion for coding. I want to be the tech girl and write thousand lines of code and maybe visit my favorite place in this world (silicon valley) and get the Zuckerberg-Bill Gates-Steve jobs type of feeling  and the same time write for New York times. My obsession for tech and books is just another feeling which is out of this world.

At that point when this guy used to give me butterflies and now its like all the butterflies have died. (story for another day)

I am at that point where i am just letting Jesus take the wheel.

“I’M FINE”

She wasn’t sad anymore. She was numb but she new somehow numb was worse. She keeps hoping that one morning she is going to wake up and this deep hurting will have disappeared but it never goes. It stays there right beside her holding tight like a fluke in the liver. “I’m happy for you “is the greatest and hardest lie she’s had to tell. He thinks she’s mad but she’s hurt and that is the whole difference.

She acted like it was no big deal but deep inside..deep inside it literally broke her. But you know the strangest thing about this pain, is if given a chance to treat him the way he does to her, she can’t. It is not the revenge type of pain it is the bittersweet type of pain. She’s hurt mentally and emotionally. But she has chosen not to GO through pain but rather GROW through pain. He’s defensive and keeps on insisting he didn’t hurt her but what he doesn’t understand is when a person tells you that you hurt them you don’t get to decide if you didn’t.

To everyone else he’s that beast and everyone says he’s not worth fighting for but she hangs on because she knows deep inside this beast there is a beauty. He just has no idea how worthless he makes her feel. Every single day she prays to God to give her the patience to wait for the right moment and the courage to accept that she has been waiting for nothing all along.

But she knows whether you loved and won or loved and lost it was always worth it. And she’s chosen to get out of this whole situation BETTER and not BITTER. She’s going to smile like nothing happened because she’s “fine”

I wish i could hurt you the way you hurt me but i know if given a chance to do the same i wouldn’t -Arthur

 

 

 

YOU LOSE BECAUSE YOU FIGHT THE WRONG BATTLES

good friend of mine captioned his photo on Instagram “i am not lucky you have no idea how much time i spend on my knees”  and it hit hard.

Do you see those relationships that have thrived so well and you wish yours was like those and not a sulky one like yours? That there were no arguments every single night and you just lived happily ever after?

Before you start yelling every relationship has issues and before you call your pack to inform them how your lover hurt you yesterday or how they are not living to your expectations ask yourself “how much time do i spend on my knees praying for him/her?” So now that you have been trying to change your better half with no success does it mean you ditch them? No it means get down on your knees and ask God to be the center of it all. When God’s warriors go down on their knees the battle is not over. It has just began.

To win the fight you have to come up with the right strategy and the right resources because victory doesn’t come by accident. If you think pin-interest and brainy quotes are the solution to a successful relationship you lack a strategy. If you use those as your weapon of defense you are not different from that person who will go to war with a bow and arrow to fight against a whole army with ammunition and grenades. You will definitely lose. Just because brainy quotes told you that “you can’t change someone who doesn’t want to change” doesn’t mean Jesus can’t. Come on if He changed water into wine what about your girlfriend/boyfriend.

Behind every successful relationship there is someone on their knees praying for it. Before you open your mouth to tell people how bad he/she ask yourself “have i thanked God for him/her today…have i prayed for his/her future today…have i thanked God for his/her studies today..how frequent do i pray for him/her…Is GOD the center of this relationship? Is GOD the third strand in our relationship?”

so before you sit down with your “council of elders” to try finding solutions to your relationship make sure you have prayed about

NO MAN THAT TRULY LOVES YOU WILL HIDE YOU

Shout out to all the side chicks who refuse to cheat on another woman’s man. If you are a side chick and you’re reading this KEEP READING it might help you. So you’ve been flirting with this guy who has already made it so clear that he’s dating? And you feel so comfortable with the whole issue. My sister the seed you are planting you will surely reap  abundantly. Don’t you ever sit down and think of yourself and wish to one day have your own man and start your family one day..invest with him and life happily ever after? Why do you allow yourself to be someone’s ‘sometimes’. Relationships are just for two people are you that poor in math??

You just sit there thinking that he’s going to someday break up with his girlfriend for you? wow! Wake up and realize you are a lot more than that. Stop allowing other people to determine your worth. The blunt truth is if you’re his side and you end up dating remember your spot has opened up and it’s free and another girl like you with no sense of direction will fill it. It is a cycle and it repeats itself every time. Refuse to be used. If you know someone is already taken please respect their relationship. Give the other girl some peace of mind.

A guy won’t respect you unless you give him something to respect. Raise your standards so high that you will be the S.I unit of self-worth and dignity. His attention means nothing if you don’t respect yourself.Just because someone desires you it does not mean they want to be with you. If you don’t walk away you will be so disappointed. A guy will make you feel the luckiest but always know at the end of it all he will go where he’d rather be. THEY DON’T CHEAT WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE BETTER THEY CHEAT WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE OKAY PLAYING SECOND!!!

if you are a guy and you have a side chick SHAME ON YOU BIG TIME!!!!!!!

JUST CLARIFY MY ‘ZONE’ DON’T LEAD ME ON

Time to grow up. You want me in the friend zone say it. I seriously have an issue with people who lead others on. People don’t have time for games anymore. With all those games in playstore, apple store, windows store you still decide to play with people’s feelings. (smh) At least respect someone enough to tell them what’s up. If you do not want to talk to them just tell them.If they’re getting on your nerves let them know. If you’re losing feelings let them know. Don’t wait to take them for a merry-go-round. They deserve to know. Why would you keep leading someone on if you’re unsure of what you feel for them. Time to grow up and speak up.

Sometimes they don’t want you to reciprocate they just want clarity. Don’t start up things if you’re not ready for them. Don’t call them sweet names and excite someone for no reason. Then the notorious ones who keep on saying they kept quiet because they never wanted to hurt you. And you just go like WOW!! that was so superman of you. Someone wrote ‘a clear rejection is better than  a fake promise’. Don’t raise someone’s expectations and later break their hearts.

You want to be friends say it. You want a relationship say it. If you are not ready to commit say it. You want a fling say it. You want a long term thing say it. In short clarify the zone and DON’T LEAD PEOPLE ON!